overextend | INBOX

And I did tell him. I explained everything that I could, and apologized. I had been too shocked when we met to think right.

[ After the fact. If Azura had been there, at least she'd have snapped him out of it... but he did immediately write to Jakob as soon as he could think on it.

His expression falters right after. ]

... it doesn't matter either way, does it? Perhaps he's as shocked as I was, but just like you chose to serve of your own free will, so has he, and made no contact after, yet. And I haven't the right to ask it of him in a place where I have no standing anyway.

[ The remainder of the drink is gulped down. ]

... you're going to tell Sakura, aren't you?

Edited 2016-09-26 04:38 (UTC)

[ Ouch, Corrin, does he really think Jakob is a more perfect retainer than he is? The insinuation alone makes him tense unpleasantly, but he holds his tongue, unwilling to upset Corrin any further. He's not here to argue about that anyway.

Instead, he focuses on his last question. ]

Why wouldn't I? I tell her everything.

[ Sakura would be upset with him if he didn't, and he also thinks she would empathize more with Corrin. As much as he is trying, he doesn't understand it from Corrin's point of view. ]

She worries for you, my lord. You are her beloved brother. She only wants you and Lord Takumi to be happy while you are both trapped here with her.

[ It's only the truth... besides, he only meant it as fact. Just like Subaki and Hana are there for Sakura and how her needs are understood perfectly by them, Jakob, Felicia and Flora understand his. Subaki might be excellent at a lot of things, but perhaps his lack of personal experience in what he claims knowledge of reduces his ability to actually empathize... books can only teach one so much. He doesn't address Subaki's tension- even if he sees it, because he knows he won't be able to explain himself as well right now.

He will apologize later for it, but right now— ]

I don't like worrying her.

[ There's a slight warning there for him to consider not telling her, but he knows it'll be futile. He sighs, though. ]

... I'm glad, though. That you aren't sure about how to help. I'd have been surprised if anyone could have. I'm sorry for troubling you, though.

[ He lowers his head, onto his arm. ]

You're too good to have to bother for someone as selfish as I am in my state.

[ he might just cry about it later when he's alone, but he peeks over his arm. ]

... are we friends, Subaki?

[ Its a strange question but after these two months of walking on eggshells around Takumi, knowing full well that Sakura and him and Subaki have a rapport and interactions he has no place demanding an involvement in... and doesn't, his guilt about all the bad things he's caused Hoshido is beginning to feel suffocating— and the loneliness that comes from it. ]

[ Truthfully, given his station below Corrin, it's a little awkward to call him his friend, but with everything that's happened, he can say with full confidence that they have grown closer here. Besides, Corrin has never really treated him with anything else but kindness and understanding, and he owes him quite a bit for not telling anyone he fell asleep in the midst of his duties ...and all the other problematic incidents that have befallen them since their arrival. ]

Yes, I believe we are, but you are still my prince first and foremost. My duty is to protect you and fight for you as I would your sister.

[ It's as honest of an answer as he can give him. He could never put anything above his duty. ]

And I don't believe I am too good for anything, let alone you. As I said before, Lady Sakura chose to fight for you because she has faith in you. Therefore, so do I.

[ No matter where they are, no matter what the terms. ]

Then I ban you from it, Subaki. If it keeps you from being my friend in the fullest sense, then you are not allowed to look after me. Or fight for me unless you wish it from your heart.

[ He smiles a little, tired from the night's conversation. ]

Perhaps if we do that, you'll be able to have someone to relax with, rather than worry about.

Edited 2016-10-09 14:30 (UTC)

You obviously can't. My duty is my du-Are you firing me?! Did I displease you that much???

[ This sounds terrible. Why would he do this? He couldn't have made him that upset. He clutches his hair, looking frazzled. How could he be relieved like this? He's an amazing warrior, isn't he? And a perfect retainer!! ]

My lord, please allow me to prove myself! Lady Sakura would be upset if she knew I failed you! My reputation as a retainer...

You didn't displease me at all. Why would you think that, Subaki?

[ He sits up, feeling a little more sober at least. ]

If you keep treating me as a master, you'll never relax around me. The way all friends do... so... I want to be your friend. If we can't have that with you being unable to relax and be yourself, then I'd rather you didn't serve me if it lets you lower your guard.

[ And, with an added smile— ]

And it might just help you learn how to solve a problem like this, should any other friend be in a situation like it, don't you think?

I...I suppose.

[ He feels so put-out by this conversation. He doesn't even know what Lord Corrin wants or needs. Perhaps, it really would be a better idea to consult Sakura even if it means having to admit his failure here. The horror. ]

I'll be by your room in the morning to bring you water and warm tea to soothe the headache you shall have. As a friend, of course!

[ Because no matter how much it bothers Corrin, he can't resist wanting to take care of others. ]

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	SUBAKI
	Homo perfectus ✿ overextend
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